Untitled
December 2016
You fell in love with the person you wanted me to be
Whether it was your mistake believing it
or my mistake not living up to it
who knows
I think we're both to blame for our parts
You ended it the same way it started
on your knees
looking up to me
Both were contrived
The first, honestly
The second, ironically
You said it was for my benefit
When it was really for yours
You made the move I chose not to take
Choosing to wait for the you I remembered
Recognized
Than the you I was living with
I'm glad you took them both away
You couldn't have predicted how much for the better it made me
No longer am I anxious
To come home
To ask how your day was
To hoping the food I cooked is good enough
To find places to hide receipts of things I've bought
as an attempt
to avoid that look you'd give me
of disgust
or disappointment
by doing something you disagree with
In your absence I grew
Stunted by a previous relationship
and then jumping heart first into yours.
I am becoming the person I am.
It's not thanks to you
but thanks to your fickle judgement
in what you thought you needed to do
You did well for me
Not for us
but I hope you did well for yourself.
We still live in Medway.
I'm sure I passed us walking down the high street.
And cycling on your bike
Although they weren't aware at the time, I wished them
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